ex-cess-An extreme or excessive amount or degree. Immoderate indulgence; intemperance in eating. drinking, etc.

bag-gage-Things that encumber one's freedom, progress, development,
or adaptability.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Self Sabbotage.....At least Im good at something.

I know what my body needs: healthy foods eaten in moderation, exercise, brain stimulation, laughter, and a good solid night sleep. However, what I need and what I do are two totally different things.

As I sit here, not cleaning but instead blogging, I feel angry at myself, disappointed and fat. I have recently gotten back into running,I have only been doing so for about a week but last night I talked myself out of going. Why didn't I run yesterday, it would be done and I would feel good about myself. I know that once I get out there its not so bad and it will be over before I know it, so why is it that I am constantly looking for reasons, better known as excuses, for not going. Oh I know, I get up at least twice during the night, then up at 7:oo am for the day, dealing with a teething baby who manages to make a huge mess even though he doesn't move, all the while running a household, and finally getting the chance to go out and run once the baby is down for the night (8:00pm). Yeah I think I'd rather eat ice cream on the couch, oh wait that's what I did!

So I should have gone for a run last night but didn't. I rationalized not going by deciding I would go for one with the baby and the dog in the morning before the first nap. When I woke up this morning I actually smiled because it was raining, I now had a legitimate reason for not going!! However, by the time breakfast was out of the way and cleaned up the rain had stopped and as I stood in front of the window in my to large t-shirt, with boogers on it that aren't mine (really they're not) and my fuzzy Christmas inspired PJ pants, smelling the coffee that as always was taking forever, I once again found reasons for not strapping in the baby and lacing up my shoes!

Not only is my own mum coming for a impromptu visit my mother-in-law is also dropping by. So I of course have cleaning to do, beds to make, and children to make presentable. As if this was not reason enough to talk my self out of the run I then doubly justified it by deciding the baby was better off just going to bed now, to be up and ready for company, then going later if at all, because what if he fell asleep on the run and woke up when we got home and I wasn't able to put him back down......Damn I'm good! Anyone need any excuses......

Mmmmm I feel like I'm 12 again, and trying to be like all of my friends and keep a diary. I was so awful at it that I always had to back date it and make stuff up because I could never remember what actually happened. However, I could justify to myself why my ultra busy 12 year old schedule kept me from writing on a daily, weekly, or even monthly basis. Even at 12 I was good at making excuses, no wonder I am so incredibly fabulous at it now!

I will go running tonight, I promise.......

Thursday, May 27, 2010

A Long Time Gone

So it turns out that having a baby and trying to do something scheduled is a joke, well at least until they are old enough to nap. Ahhhhhh sweet sweet nap time where have you been all my child's life...........Well I guess I can't be to mad as your here now, thank frickin god!!!!

So on that note, of not being able to be mad, to you my most faithful readers I do ask that you not hold my absence against me as I was just doing what I do, being a mum. and how could you resist a face like this...

Lets get caught up. Hi I'm Laena an overweight, semi-new mum who's whole world has been taken over by someone else's schedule. It's like my mind and my body have been taken over by this foreign being, who feels the need to change everything I've ever been, including skinny! My sleep pattern has been changed, I now have very little to none. My eating habits have also changed, I now follow the "cold infusion diet," which includes such things as cold coffee, which I now drink allot of, cold toast or cereal, which is also cold. Lunch follows along the lines of the previous nights dinner, which most people call leftovers, eaten cold and usually while feeding the foreign being himself or doing various other motherly tasks. Side note- do not fold laundry while trying to consume lunch, or breakfast and dinner for that matter, the result will be more laundry which means more time doing more chores. Who needs lunch anyways, we are after all trying to lose weight. Dinner on the "Cold Infusion Diet" is usually fairly healthy, the husband, who usually has such "long and hard" days comes home expecting something for dinner. Mmmmm speaking of foreign beings taking over my body and committing me to things I don't want to do.......So I make something "fabulous" and then sit down to feed my little one, which is never as quick as you think its going to be, and then turn to eat my own meal. Which of course has gotten cold and which of course I'll have to share because nothing is no longer just mine. So there it is, the "Cold Infusion Diet," at least when the baby pulls on my coffee cup and spills it over the two of us, catastrophes are avoided, because of course it's cold!

Now, onto The Jeans. I have not given up on them, they are still here in plain sight, haunting me, however, they have moved back into my room, life went on even is the blog didn't. I will not fit them by the original due date, that is obvious. I am still however, working on it, yeah me!

Later I will get you caught up on all of my latest resolutions as well as my latest indulgences, and oh yes there have been many......

So, to sum it all up, I'M BACK.......